Staying within the shadows does not come easy. I am frozen in time. I do not last long in others memories, I prefer it that way. Still the motions of everyday life become useless. I used to see this life as a sentenced to some wrong doing of mine, that is until I met him. He made me feel alive. He made me miss the warmth of the sunshine. With one of his whispers he thawed my cold heart. With one of his embraces he calmed the relentless hunger in me. Yet I must let him go. I cannot force him to love and remain by an ageless night creature that craves blood. For the sake of his safety and well being, I must let him go. I arranged to meet Seth, in our favorite spot. Under the romantic gleam of the moonlight by the creek. The rushing waters served as a melody to our romance and perfectly hid our forbidden love. Seth seemed to be intrigued of the future, where I did not see a future with him. How could I? My kind does not mix well with his. Seth is human and I am not. I am a vampire and I must erase the memories of Seth. He deserves a love that grows old with him.
As I wait by the creek, the gentle breeze brings a sense of grief over me for this is the last night with him. My thoughts are interrupted, as strong warm arms wrap around me. “I missed you Amber” Seth whispers as he pulls me close to his body. The smell of the woods and the clean scent of his, magnified in my senses drives me wild. I turned around to fully submerge myself in his arms, as he lifts my chin and softly kisses my lips. Not wanting to ever stop the kiss, I pull away for I need to put an end to this. “Seth, we must talk, you need to forget me” I said holding back tears. “Even if you make me forget, I will always find a way to remember you” Seth insists as he draws closer. “We can’t be together anymore, it’s not fair to you”. I find myself wrapped once again in his arms. He pulls my face to his and I melt into his eyes. He brushes my hair out of my face sending tingles down my spine. The taste of his kisses are sweet and I go in for seconds for I do not have the willpower to break apart at this time. We gently lay under a large tree, serving as a canopy for our continued embrace. The stars above us are witness as our bodies intertwined. His body laying over me as I am engulfed in his caress. Every inch of my skin feeling his soft lips. His hands grasping my thighs as he enters into the depths of me. Our hands locked as we unleash our love. With countless memories that are housed in my mind, intimacy with Seth are the best memories this life has given me.
“How can you still want to end us” an upset Seth pacing back and forth yells at me. One moment we were passionately drunk in love and now the unfortunate reality of our demise hitting us like a wave. “You know I have to, you deserve more!” I exclaimed. Seth goes over to the large tree and with his pocket knife starts carving “Seth loves Amber 4-ever”. I look at him questioning this random act “What are you doing”. After finishing the wood carving, he comes at me and says “Now I may have a reminder of you even when my memories fail”. Seth falls on his knees. My tears falling out of my face, I go and place his face in my hands. “I love you Seth” those were my last words to my Seth before I erased myself from his memories. With my aching heart I begin the ritual vampires used to wipe out memories from humans. My fingers brush Seth’s left eye brow as I look into his eyes and shakily say “Amber was never in your life, you will forget all traces of her from your memories. You will move on and live your life as if you never met her”. Seth faints after the words are said. I rush behind the large tree to hide for the faint only lasts a few minutes. I witness from afar as Seth wakes up confused. He gets up without looking behind and leaves to continue his life without me. I sobbed as I watched him leave. I know that I erased his memories and he would only experience deja vu but will not remember his feelings for me. In this moment I vowed to stay in the shadows. Overseeing him, protecting him but not allowing myself to interrupt his life again.
I stayed away from Seth. Throughout the years, I was near enough to see him live his life. I was somewhat of a guardian vampire, making sure he remained safe. He followed his dream and became an architect, a good one at that. He found love again and married a beautiful woman that made him happy. It was a bittersweet feeling to see him be happy with someone else but his happiness reassured me that I had made the best decision. I saw him play with his children and enjoyed hearing their playful laughter. I remained in the shadows making sure our paths did not cross again. For I kept remembering his words that he told me in our last night together, that he will always find a way to remember me. I did not want to test to see if he would really fight the magic I used to erase his memories. Until one day that I stumbled across Seth by lack of timing. His youngest daughter all grown up, was getting married. My curiosity to see him as an older man got the best of me. As the reception concluded, I stepped out of the shadows, thinking I had enough time to go on my way. Seth stopped me in my tracks and with a look of confusion said “Do I know you?” My heart leaped out my chest as I managed to fool him I was a part of the clean up crew. Seth seemed to accept my lie and proceeded to interact with the remaining guests at the reception. As I walked away, I looked back and Seth was staring back at me. Our eyes locked for a moment. His eyes had aged to perfection. He quickly walked to me but I dashed out as fast as I could leaving behind Seth yelling “Wait, don’t go!” This was a close call. He was confused but he did not remember me. This brought me some peace after I shed tears. I missed him greatly. I craved to run back to his arms but remained faithful to my decision to let him live a life without me. This close encounter brought such heaviness to my heart. I did not see Seth for a few years, I needed to be apart for having him see me rattled my existence.
As I returned to check up on Seth after quite some time, his children were concerned for their father had gone missing. Seth was old of age and with failing health. His wife had passed by this time. My heart was broken for I feared the worst. I should've not let so many years pass without checking up on him. I was supposed to keep him safe anonymously. He was supposed to have a full life and a happy ending. I did not dare to interact with his children for they were adults and would wonder why a young girl would be asking for their father’s whereabouts. In tears I searched the town where we fell in love in. Reminiscing how I met Seth and how our love flourished. He was nowhere to be found. I felt helpless. Whatever magic my being had was not enough to know where the love of my life was. Feeling defeated, I decided to go back to Seth’s and I favorite spot. The spot where we would be together and all was perfect in our world. I knew I would not find Seth here for I wiped this place from his memory. Going there was for my consolation.
As I reached the creek, I noticed from afar the large tree with the carving. Something or someone was lying there. Scared I rushed towards the tree. The tree was grand and still displayed the carving of two lovers ingrained in its history. On the large roots laid a fragile elderly Seth. His breathing was faint. I slowly bend down and sat by his side to raise his head from the ground. His eyes looked into mine and he let out a sigh as tears rolled down his eyes. “Seth, what are you doing here? I whispered. Seth with limited strength reached towards my hand. His hand weathered of age gently tugged mine. Struggling to speak, he whispered “I told you, I would find a way to remember you”. He looked at me one last time with a faint smile as he took his last breath. He slipped from life as he laid in my arms leaving me alone in my eternity without his love.
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